What to Give Up
bread? cheese? self-improvement?
Lent began on March 5th. Growing up in the Baptist church, I do not remember lent being a part of my church calendar. I was introduced when I became an Episcopalian. Lent is the forty days leading up to Easter. It is a time to reflect, fast, and pray. It’s been a few years since I’ve participated. I haven’t prioritized finding something to give up or take on consistently for 40 days. So I got that going for me.
On Ash Wednesday, Lyndsay Rush (@maryoliversdrunkcousin) posted this poem on her instagram. It’s awesome.
I’m Giving Up for Lent
What would it feel like to give up
self-improvement
for forty days?
Would the tightness in our chests, throat, shoulders, and hips
ease as we contentedly took the easy way out?
Would capitalism crumble if we deleted our wish lists
and framed the before photo?
Sounds holy, if you ask me.
to be sold on life as-is
to just exist
with only this, only us
only what these two arms can hold.
Awesome right? Follow this link for more Lyndsay.
Way back in my youth - you couldn’t tell me diddly squat. I knew pretty much everything. I couldn’t recognize, much less spell personal growth. And wasn’t open to hearing about it from anyone in authority. Now that I’ve “matured” and have been around a couple blocks, maybe I do have some room for improvement. Yes. Yes I do. I want to be a better human. The early version had to be endured and experienced to arrive at my well-aged, extended dance mix version. Bless all those who got to experience that version. But now there is a near constant loop of self improvement books, podcasts, memes and newsletters. It galvanizes, sparks and motivates. Learning what makes me - all of us - tick and tock is fascinating.
But constant anything - with the exception of birdsong and the smell of baking bread - can be exhausting. What needs to be “worked” on now? Taking a break to be present in the moment and appreciate what is - what is right now - what I can see, feel, smell, taste - is just what the doctor ordered.
Fasting from betterment is a good lesson and reminder that it’s not all me - all the time. If the only thing I’m concentrating on is growth - my growth, I will lose sight of what has already been cultivated and what is happening right now. Maybe something has sprouted!
I’m pretty sure I will continue to be a self improver and I will continue to rebel against being told what to do. The ability to be who I want and what I want is a strength and I’m grateful. Also - releasing the tension in my jaw, and my shoulders feels good. So does paying attention to spring unfolding and birdsong.
Here’s a little something from Nadia Bolz-Weber from the 2021. Follow the link for the entire post.
“…the most basic discipline of Lent is to peel even the thinnest layer of insulation away. It is to see who I am without something I thought I needed, without others telling me who I am, without something that I thought was a need, but was just another accessory draining the car battery.”
Sending you buckets of love on your lenten journey - whatever that looks like.